Sunday, 27 February 2011

A little more on MS and me

The surgeon that graphed  my shoulder  back together, and installed that kewl exotic metal  in my arm, gave me a most insightful description of my MS. He said “it’s a real pain in the ass disease isn’t it”  :-)  He is one of the few specialists in the medical field I have met with a sense of humor, and a great personality! And to top it off he is a great surgeon as well.

Of course I believe his synopsis was influenced by the fact that my arm is taking way longer to recover than was expected. I know my arm recovery is directly related to my MS. I can tell when I get out of bed in the morning how well my arm is going to respond to physio, by how my legs are responding to walking that day. The good  is that, although it may be very slow, and is taking a lot of time and effort, my arm does continue to make small gains in improved mobility each week.
The ever present pain has really just melded into the background of my life with the MS pain. Both are not enough to take any more than mild medication for, but both annoy me at times.

I discovered something new for me and my MS recently. There are some theories that stress can cause or at least instigate MS attacks. Studies have not proven this, but it is one of the many theories out there brought to light by observation.
I don’t know about stress causing attacks, but it sure caused the intensifying of symptoms for me. I recently went through some major self induced stress that sent my symptoms into over drive. It caused flashes of vertigo like I have never experienced before, These flashes were not totally unlike being literally stoned. Along with the vertigo came anxiety attacks strong enough to make me paranoid. As well my leg went into hyper drive buzzing so bad I must have looked like one of those wobbly punching bag toys for kids as I was walking through the mall. A few hours later, a lot calmer, and I was back to what has become my usual. It is a little scary to wonder though, if the stress was not brought under control quickly, at some point would the symptoms persist even once the stress was relived?
The other side of this is..... which and to what extent if not all of these things were MS and which the Stress ? All in all, an experience I can do with out repeating and I will be adding “major stress” to the things to be more conscious about in the future, and try to avoid it at all costs.

MS is a pain in the ass. It is something that has no solidity. It is ever flowing and changing from day to day. It is at best unpredictable. But no matter how it affects me from one day to the next, I remind myself I am lucky. For lot of people, MS has effected their lives much worse than mine.

Let me have the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, 
The Courage to change the things I can, 
And  most importantly the Wisdom to know the difference!

Quote of the day

«While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about.»

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